The dominos effect

This entry is written so i can redeem myself. A part of the reader group was not particularly happy with my last entry and was exceptionally critical of it(mainly Arjun, that's about 20% of my reader group, "Yet"). I did receive some appreciation for that entry as well but now i think that reader group was just being kind to me(namely mallika, that's another 20%). So here we are. Deepak has had the pleasure of reading this already. This is a narrative, A conclusion & a story in itself. Read it and give me your comments and I will give you the prologue, which will throw some light on the situation. Here it is ....
That day at the hospital, I was angry, angry that He had done this to us. I didn’t yell at him though. I couldn’t. I realized that he had done more to himself than us. We all met that day in his room at Apollo. That was the last time we were all at the same place at the same time. None of us thought that this would be the last time, but then none of us was prepared for this either. There was nothing left to do but wait for the inevitable. He was still at his humorous best. Making us laugh like he had totally disconnected himself from why we were here in the first place.

I did not want to remind him. I did not want to remind myself either, and then it happened at 11:25 pm Sunday the 27th of March 2010. He was liberated and we were besieged. Everyone went through the drill of breaking down, then going into denial and then eventually giving up and walking away. I went through none. I had been with him the most in his last days. I was running all that he told me in the days before he passed through my mind. Nothing that he said was serious. He even chose to watch a full cricket test match. But what was most remarkable that in the time of peril & excruciating pain, his humor had not left him. His jokes kept ringing in my ear and a constant smile showed on my face. I couldn’t, help drawing a parallel – He was a sailor who wanted crew to be on his ship, he came into our lives and convinced us all to join him on a journey rather than living our mundane yet safe lives on the shores and he promised it would be fun. We hopped in and oh boy was it fun. It’s like our lives ceased to be stationary or motionless and became dynamic like the moves of the ship negotiating the waves. We went onward to beautiful new lands and experiences. Our lives became purposeful and happy. There was something new to look forward to every day. He taught us the importance of competing & why it was necessary to win. This was another of his qualities, other than the quick wit, the extreme energy and the unexplained disregard for consequence.

And then one day he just jumped into the sea……………………………………………
He did not swim just drowned and drowned and drowned till the darkness of the sea is all that was left. We all scrambled as we had learned how to live it up everyday but it seems that none of us was paying attention when he told us how to steer the ship. SO it started to wobble and was rocked from every side by waves we had never seen before. No one knew what to do. Every one got out in all the life boats they could find except me and Joji. We did not have any lifeboats. And now the big Ship sails in the vast oceans, aimlessly, in random directions. And I sit on this boat pensive, distant lonely. Joji is also on this boat but we don’t meet very often. He lives in a different part of it.

It’s been one year since he died, we all made up our mind to meet at our favorite spot again to try and rekindle our lives, maybe catch up. Well not all but most of us. Raz has gone away to New Zealand and lives there with her husband. Meeting at that place was the worst idea ever. It had been long so we had healed a little but going to that place and not having him around to make us laugh took everything away from it. It seemed unusually empty. What it did accomplish is bring back painful memories. This was the last time I ever spoke to any of them. We kept in touch through E-mail from a few months and then never again.

And the Ship sails on. (Still Aimless)